January 26, 2008

• Hellish Hat Hair and Finding Common Ground

  Okay, so I like alliteration, I admit it.  You’ve probably noticed that if you’ve read many of my posts!  Anyway, here today is a tale about tresses.  I generally hate getting my hair cut, and here’s why:

  1. All the little tiny hairs that poke me afterward and fall into my shoes until I shower and change;
  2. Being in the hair place with all the chemical smells, and extreme focus on external appearance;
  3. Spending money on my own external appearance, even though I usually like it better afterward;
  4. Frequently having to insist, yes, I really DO want it that short, it grows back out again really FAST;
  5. Frequently having to insist, no, I really do NOT want gel or mousse or styling, just comb and air dry;
  6. Trying to figure out how much of a tip to give to not overspend but not seem like a cheapskate; and
  7. Feeling like an oddball and awkward silence or awkward conversation (or both) with the hairstylist.

  So sometimes (especially in the warmer months), I just shave my head at home and let it grow back out for many blissful non-haircutting months.  Otherwise, I tend to wait until my bangs obstruct my vision or I just feel too shaggy, and then I spontaneously stop by one of those cheap cuts places while in the city on errands; that way I don’t dread it beforehand.  While I often feel stylishly-challenged entering such places, it was worse than usual this last time.  It’s been so consistantly cold here for so much longer than usual that I had been skipping my winter kitchen sink bathing and hair washing routine.  When I first took off my hat
  in the place that day I was still looking at the stylist’s face as she was talking, so I saw her eyes grow large in shock at the sight of my hair! 

  [NOTE:  Since my dog and cat are quite oblivious to my looks, and I can go days or a week without seeing other humans, and I don't really have a good place in the cabin for a mirror, I can forget to observe the look of
  my hair for days on end. 
  On the day of the recent haircut, despite having been trapped under a hat during the
  hour's drive to the city, my hair had rebounded remarkably well to stand straight up several inches tall in untamed glory upon removal of the hat.  It seems that enough hair oil had accumulated to act a bit like styling mousse, and I had been absentmindedly massaging my scalp and pulling my hair straight up periodically during the previous
  few days -- unknowingly creating a full-headed mohawk effect.] 

  Upon seeing
  her horrified expression, I immediately looked into mirror and was QUITE shocked myself at the sight, but by then of course it was too late to mitigate it.  So, I tried to act nonchalant while recognizing that oddness of this encounter:  the un-fashion conscious woods-dweller in flannel, jeans, and hiking boots with nightmare hair meeting the highly fashionable femme with makeup, stylish attire and hair clearly coiffed by intention rather than happenstance.  I was quite embarrassed by the state of my hair, especially in such an appearance based setting.  I told
  her the whole thing about living alone in the woods, and the cold-snap affecting my hair-washing.  She shampooed it twice in fact without my
  asking her too; I’m guessing she has never felt it necessary to do that before!  By then, she seemed even more shocked by my
  lifestyle than my ill styled hair, seemingly unable to understand that I live in a simple cabin in the woods by choice, imparting to me that she in contrast is
  a natural urbanite, not a nature person.

  But setting those obvious differences aside, I was surprised at how quickly we discovered common ground around feeling strongly about how much pets enrich our lives.  By the end I no longer felt
  like she saw me as a freak (which I had sensed around the time of my
  initial unveiling and lifestyle description), and I no longer felt
  estranged by our obvious differences.  Beyond a much needed double-shampoo and haircut, this ended up being an excellent lesson for me in remembering that even with people who seem very different from us, we frequently share much more common ground than the basic underlying human physiology which unites all of us.  And a good reminder about how delightful it can feel making such discoveries and connections.

  ps – I have a scholarship membership to the YMCA in the city, and got to take a lovely long, luxurious hot shower as a treat after the haircut.  Nothing like going without something like hot showers to really renew my gratitude for them!

  • 11:18 pm
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